ThE rOaD nOt TaKeN.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
This is a line from a U2 song, but it describes how fast things move in this world. If you stop moving for a moment, you find that life passes you by in a flash and it's really difficult to get started again. On a treadmill, the moment you stop running, you will fly off the machine in less than 2 seconds. Once you stop, it is more likely for you to lose your balance and fall off the machine. To get started again without stopping the machine is potentially dangerous and quite stupid.
With experience, we learn to anticipate when the pace gets heavier and prepare ourselves mentally. For me, this week is about knowing that it's time to get busy and psyching myself up for the challenge. It's also about knowing that I want to do it but there are still periods of self-doubt where I don't see any progress made and I question if I'm heading in the right direction.
I read earlier last week that Mother Teresa(one of the people I respect but have never met) grappled with doubt as well in her final years. So I guess, it is something that we all face at some point in our lives without exception. Despite her doubt, she still persevered with her life and her vocation/calling and helped countless people deal with their poverty and sickness. I think I read somewhere that being brave is about doing the right thing even when you're afraid. Perhaps determination is about doing something that needs to be done even though you are not 100% sure.
I wish I could be sure. My body is ready to chiong but my mind is still at the service counter asking for directions. Which makes for a very uncomfortable condition. My only hope is that I know this is a temporary set-back and I will bounce back soon with double or even triple power...(like Superman reborn). However, while I'm still in this state, I don't have to like it.
Bleah!
(as you can tell, I'm waiting for my positive thinking to kick in...)Labels: self-doubt
